I know, here I am sharing these thoughts on my blog, hoping to reach others through the very means of which I am frustrated.
My dear Daughter had me listen to a talk on DVD by Hank Smith, "Breaking up with the World". He asks what are you willing to "break up" with to become who you want to be? So I made a list, first of who I want to become...
- Play the Piano 30 minutes a day
- Learn to speak French
- Stop eating sugar and gain a healthy weight
- get outside everyday
- de clutter my home
- have a thriving blog
- Live in the moment with my children
- Give my Little children the same advantages aka. my time, as I did my big children.
- Create everyday
- Fill my days with people I love- the real people not their profile
- Go on adventures with my family... maybe even weekly!
- Read good books
I have tried to put my finger on the why and the how. How did I get here why do I give in over and over. Well there is some science behind it. I am not going to get into it right now but it is an addiction. It does give us a kind of rush. I know that in the middle of a crazy day I am drawn to the numbness of rearranging candy or even vegetables on a board. Scrolling through the pictures of another's life seems rewarding some how. Almost as good as living it myself. Scary and so sad. But when the house is a mess and others are pulling me in every direction, zoning out has it's charms
I remember 'way back when' watching a T.V sitcom about a pair of glasses that would give you a virtual experience. Seemed far fetched at the time... isn't that what we do everyday? Live our lives vicariously through another's profile, a movie on Netflix or the tweets and twitters that zoom past us?
So here is a list of what I am willing to let go of, break up with and move away from
- Daily use of Netflix
- Games that don't include real people sitting around my table
- Checking my cell phone more then 2x a day
- Sugar and processed food
I have a quote on my wall that my son said to me a few months ago,
"The only difference between a dream and a goal is waking up!" -Nathan Wynder-
So I am choosing to wake up. I am breaking away from the pull of numbness and choosing to live my real life... What ever that might look like! I hope to share it right here. Keeping myself on track and maybe encouraging others along the way!
I hope you will join me along the way!